Many times we are determined to focus on making a dream a reality, pursuing a goal or building a new empowering habit, but we find ourselves giving up because we don't want to disturb others around us, specially our loved ones. When we perceived that they do not support us we tend to use that as an excuse to give up. Yes, and excuse, because I think that lack of support, we perceive is not always real, is just a result of assumptions we make in our minds.
We must understand that we can only influence how people view us, but we cannot control them. It's also important to remind ourselves that the only “yes” we need to follow our dreams is ours and that if we don't pursue our dreams we will regret it later in life, or when and if we end up pursuing those dreams we will question ourselves why we didn't pursue them earlier.
People who follow their dreams are doers. Doers have more power to create, influence, and change their environment. When you are resilient and pursue your dreams you will have the power to influence others around you, and those who might not support you today might become your greater supporters or even be inspired by you to purse their own dreams.
Remind yourself, life feels more memorable when you pursue your dreams, and while following your dreams might take unexpected turns, those are the exciting and memorable challenges of living the dream. Those challenges will help you grow as they make you step out of your comfort zone, and that can bring more opportunities. Accomplishing your dreams will spark even bigger dreams.
Here are a few things to consider to help you persevere in the pursuit of your dreams and get the support of your loved ones.
Be clear on your why.
You don't have a strong and clear why any challenge on your way will make a good excuse to give up. Spending some time reconnecting with your why, why is this important to you, and how pursuing your dream, new lifestyle or goals can impact your life is key. Your why will always keep you grounded and will provide you direction.
Ask for their support and explain exactly how they can help you.
Many times, I think that our interpretation of lack of support is just a miscommunication around expectations. Just because someone does not support you in the way you would like them to support you doesn't mean they don't support you. As yourself: have you ask for their support? Have you been clear on how they can show up for you and support you? Or are you assuming they should know?
Let them know that you are not expecting them to join you or that you will not push them to do it with you.
Just like you are looking for their support is important that you respect their own journeys. Sometimes is just important to clearly state that you do not expect them to do this with you, as many times they might assume that is what you are expecting.
Acknowledge that their push back is not about you, is about them.
The important people in your life may feel jealous of the time you spend on your dreams. Maybe, they had dreams of their own that they eventually gave up on.
Sometimes they are just looking at it from a different perspective, they are speaking out of their own experience and because something might not worked for them in the past of experienced deception or pain they just want to protect you from the same disappointment.
Have a response ready
People will criticize you and push back, be ready, anticipate how can that show up and be prepare
with a response. When we are taken off guard by someone's push back comments we are most vulnerable and most likely question yourself end up giving up on your dreams. Instead try to think of all the things people might say, all the ways they might push back and prepare in advance how you'll respond those push backs.
Finally, remember that your dreams and your actions define you. Don’t let others define you with what they tell you to do and not to.
It’s your life, live it under your terms!